Bobby Bonilla- Former Mets/Pirates
Player, Future Hall of Famer
How well do you know baseball?, because if you don't know this guy your
either retarded or gay. Bobby is currently working in the player's association
and stands a good chance of ending up in the hall of fame.
So I'm at a charity function last night in Greenwich, CT for MasterCard,
5 screwdrivers deep I see the biggest hispanic dude I've ever run into
in my life. My Buddy ever the sports nut is like 'dude that's fucking
Bobby Bonilla', I was like 'That huge dude over there?, no way man'. We're
talking to him a little bit and this fucking fat ass that looked like
Tom Arnold (Roseanne Bar Days) or Chris Farley looking mother fucker,
wearing a fucking T.J Maxx suit wouldn't stop dominating the conversation
with the poor guy. I mean, I honestly thought he was going to ask Bobby
if he could blow him and have him autograph his lips. This guys was annoying
as fuck. The place is crowded with big wig suits, the queer eye gang,
a couple of pieces of ass and some librarian looking chicks- a pretty
mixed crowd. So in the middle of the conversation I see Bobby give a face
like he was about to run out of the room, followed by a smirk that could
only mean one thing. Bonilla farted so fucking bad, it literally cleared
the ballroom. People ran out like the place was hit with nerve gas. The
look on the crowd's face was almost as memorable as the ass-kissing homo
(that wouldn't leave Bonilla alone) pretending like he didn't notice and
doing a semi-head spin to check his own ass in fear that he just crop-dusted
the Major-Leaguer. Needless to say a couple of bong hits later me and
my buddy could not stop laughing about the night. My pic with Bonilla
is attached.
On a side note, I come to find out my friend's broadband telephone number
is 201-867-5309. Now sing it, 8-6-7-5-3-0-9. So feel free to call him
and leave a prank call he gets about 20 a day.
